It’s that Wednesday again. Time to get some insecurities out….confessions r us! Be sure to visit the IWSG site to read what others have to share!
I want to write. I want to write and write and write and I want to publish and make lots of money doing it. At times I think, “Why don’t I just write a cheesy little novel that is all vampire, or wolf, or Fairy, or whatever just so I can publish it and have a book done and sell it like crazy hotcakes on a winter’s day down in the south with Mama Jamma…!!! Why the heck not? It can’t be hard, right?
Ugh.
Then I realize the truth. I’m just not that kind of writer. And after I take into consideration that my novels are deeply layered story ideas that have a lot going on in them and that those are the type of books that are INSIDE me…then I sit back and sigh. I have two books written, two books that need editing, and I’ve got a few works in progress. I can either get lost in the maze of getting something out fast and publishing it and starting all over again…or I can take what I have inside me and write from the heart.
It’s not the lack of writing…because as I said, I have two books written from beginning to end. How many people can say that? You know? Sure, I need to kick my ass into gear and finish editing the material. And I need to get my one book self-published and I need to get my shit together and push my other manuscript out there to find and agent who will love it as much as me.
I need to quit wasting my time crying over the idea of books that are not my style and just write what’s inside me and get the stuff 
done. “get ‘er’ done” right? LOL
Still, writing is hard. It’s not always fun either. And sometimes it sucks. Really sucks. But I also don’t want to lose sight of myself or the stories that are inside me. The REAL stories that I have to tell. I’m sure I could push out a wimpy, cheesy book but I would look at it and say…oh my Gosh…why did I lower myself and my standards for something like THAT? I could have spent that time applying my passion and my skills and my knowledge to what I truly want to write.
I have a lot of stuff to write. I have a lot of stuff to scream out at the world ‘read me and read me well!’ But if I keep looking at the kind of writing that is the easy way out, I’ll never be satisfied. More so…frustrated, angry, guilty, and totally stupid for having done that.
My lesson through this post:
Don’t lower yourself or your writing standards. Don’t lose your voice because you are impatient. It’s so not worth it in the long run.
Cheers,
Michala
Drowning In Words ∫∫ Michala Tyann 
Well said 🙂 I am the worst at editing. I want to let someone else just do it, but I also want to make sure there are no embarrassing errors either. It reminds me of my mom as a kid, she’d pay someone to come clean the house once a month, but she’d spend two days before scrubbing everything so they didn’t see her house dirty. I will bite the bullet this year and get my finished MS edited, professionally, so I can start querying!
Meredith
Meredith’s Musings
I agree that you have to write what you’re passionate about because writing IS really, really hard and you need to be in love with your idea. (BTW, considering the number of people writing “vampire, wolf, or whatever” who may stop by your blog, you may want to reconsider describing those things as “cheesy.”) Good luck with your books and your agent queries! 🙂
Oh, I in no way meant to apply that writing vampire, wolf, ect was cheesy…some of my most favorite books I’ve had the fortune of reading were about such things…in fact my best friend writes about witches and vampires. LOL I meant to apply that ‘cheesy’ statement to the material I would have written. LOL I meant that if I were the one writing it…it would thus likely be cheesy because that is not my genre style. I’m no good at it. Haha! All you brilliant writers who CAN write vampire, fae, wolf, ect…I’m in awe of your mad super skills!!!!!
Thanks Lexacain for stopping and reading.
You have to write YOUR style, your passion. I could pump out something that sells better than what I write (space opera) but it wouldn’t be me.
You know, it’s really all about learning about the person we are and harnessing those things we learn, using them to our advantage, and most definitely not abusing them. Thanks for visiting and THANKS for commenting!
Well said! I’ve felt the same thing (in fact, in June I was trying to outline “the novel I was going to write really fast so that I could put it out as an ebook and make tons of money”. And you know what happened? The story turned out to be really layered and demanded more time. Like you, I’m just not that type of writer. Stay true to who you are and write from your heart and trust me; your audience will love you for it.